I’m in Germany for an adult skating competition. It’s been on my bucket list since I returned to skating. I registered for the competition, but a question about my skating membership number tripped me. I don’t have one. I’ve let my Australian membership lapse yet I wasn’t yet integrated into the Swiss system.
I wrote TBA on the form and continued. I’ll sort it out.
Later my registration was accepted and it was time to sort it out. I’m not living in Australia and my memberships have lapsed. International skating union rules meant I hadn’t been here long enough to be eligible to enter for Switzerland. I’m in no man’s land. Who will I skate for?
It reminded me that I’m still in transition. Transitioning from my life in Australia to live in Switzerland. It’s been huge. Huge. Good. But huge. Glad I’m here. Still huge.
𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘣𝘪𝘨 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘦. 𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴.
Finding ourselves in an in-between place. No longer in the old space, but you haven’t yet fully arrived and settled in your new destination. For some transitions, you aren’t even sure of your next destination and what your journey involves. The in-between phases are challenging because you might still be grieving where you are coming from, or what you’ve been through. A confusing time because you’re looking at what you’re leaving behind, or where you no longer fit.
These are very delicate spaces. You’re hurting, parts of your old self are breaking but the new version hasn’t been formed or revealed. It’s hard to make plans when you don’t know where you are headed.
𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘣𝘪𝘨 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘦. 𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴. 𝘠𝘰𝘶’𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘶𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘺.
𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘤𝘬.
𝗜𝗻𝗳𝗲𝗿𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝗶𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗰𝗸 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝗻-𝗯𝗲𝘁𝘄𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗽𝗵𝗮𝘀𝗲.
You choose to start a family. Instead of finding family life, you find yourself stuck on a path you didn’t want to be on. The rollercoaster of trying to conceive.
Negative pregnancy tests, another menstruation, diagnostic tests, more tests, miscarriage, and considering options you didn’t want to consider. Stuck in making times for appointments, plans and somewhere you don’t want to be. At the same time, those around you announce pregnancies and baby showers. The pressure builds up the further down the path you walk.
You didn’t choose this path. You don’t want to be on this path. You‘ve no idea if the path you’ve been walking will lead you to your baby.
𝑌𝑜𝑢 𝑘𝑒𝑒𝑝 𝑤𝑎𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔, ℎ𝑢𝑟𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔, 𝑡𝑟𝑦𝑖𝑛𝑔, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 ℎ𝑜𝑝𝑖𝑛𝑔.
𝗪𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗴𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗰𝗸?
I’ve been through this. I’ve helped other women through this.
You have your unique journey, unique challenges, and different solutions. What we have in common is that we get stuck here in transition. Because you’re ready for the next phase, motherhood.
Finding support isn’t always easy. Some treatments forget this part and focus on only one aspect. You might find you need different types of support.
Getting your body ready for a healthy pregnancy differs from fertility treatment. While emotional support is different again. Yet they are all complementary. They support you in a holistic way. Holistic preconception wellbeing care certainly helps your fertility in multiple ways and can provide emotional support.
I offer support by creating a space for all of you.
Guiding and helping you make tweaks to your lifestyle practices to better your hormonal balance and fertility. Soothing the parts that are hurting, supporting you through these phases, while you keep trying.
Through the big transitions and micro-transitions. The transition to seeking help, the transition from natural to clinical support, and the transition from pregnancy to loss. From one treatment to another. From a woman trying to pregnant to becoming a mother. Encouraging the parts of you that are determined and motivated, the parts that are hopeful, and the parts that are courageously walking the path to your dreams.
𝗪𝗵𝗼 𝗮𝗺 𝗜 𝘀𝗸𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗼𝗿?
It took a couple of weeks to sort it out. The truth is that I’m an adult skater and no one really cares LOL. I’m skating for Switzerland. I’ll honour where I’ve come from, who I am, as well as where I am currently. I’ll be wearing my Australian jacket. I’ve added something Swiss to my T-shirt and I’ve got some ribbons.
𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂?
What are you struggling with? Do you need more support?
If you need help through your transition send me a message, maybe I can help. Or I can help you find someone who can.
With love, Ileana xx
ileana kapic 2023